Kailyn’s Baby Daddy’s “Hoes” Woes

All of you baby-crazy ladies & gents better prepare your emotions for the new season of Teen Mom 2, which promises to contain some serious pregnancy and birth action. Oh, and a new cast member!

 

 

 

Sneak peeks for the upcoming season so far have been a bit of a snooze fest, but today Radar released an article about one of them in particular that hints toward some of that Mama Drama that we are all so hopelessly addicted to. In it, we see a pregnant Kailyn Lowry FaceTiming her friend Kristen (who is in Kail’s phone as “Soul Sister”, which 14-year old me would’ve found adorable) about Chris Lopez a.k.a. Baby Daddy No. 3 a.k.a. I Can Barely Keep These Guys Straight.

Kail seems annoyed as she discusses Lopez not wanting to film or have his name mentioned in the show. Then she drops this like it’s nothing: “He probably just like… he doesn’t want his other hoes to know about me.”

Awkward

Uh. What?

Soul Sister responds “Playa playa!” and cringing viewers are left wondering if they are serious.

On the one hand, it wouldn’t be shocking, since Kailyn has a history of making babies with jerks. Let’s not forget that even Jo was kind of a butthead back in the day. One time he told Kail she didn’t deserve the sunshine and should live in a cave. That’s some cold shit, Jonathan.

But on the other hand, maybe it’s not true at all and Kail was just throwing shade. It’s hardly believable that a guy put a baby in a uterus that has been on TV for seven years, and now thinks he can have “hoes” who don’t know about it. The hoes know, Chris! They always know!

Also, remember when Kail claimed this baby was planned? The Lopez Hoes Revelation adds a whole new dimension to that claim. If it’s true and the baby was planned, it means she purposefully got knocked up by a guy who she didn’t even know well enough to recognize that she was merely one of his Harem of Hoes. This only adds onto the messiness surrounding this pregnancy, which includes the fact that she was still married to Javi when it was “planned”.

The Hoes are only the first part of the Radar sneak peek! We don’t even have time to recover from this brief conversation when it cuts to a scene of Jo visiting and Kail looks up from her phone for long enough to share a couple of sentences. Kail says her divorce has been recently finalized after OVER A YEAR. Yikes. It’s hard to not feel bad for Kail’s boys Isaac & Lincoln, but she tells Jo she thinks they are taking it okay, and I guess we’ll see soon enough.

When Kail says she never wants to get married again and a producer asks her “what about relationships?” she responded in a way that made me uncontrollably roll my eyes for an hour:

“Don’t start with that bullshit… It’s such a not-solid situation that I just don’t want to discuss any of it on TV.”

Mmm, okay, but her profession is literally discussing things on TV. This is not the first or second or third time that Kailyn didn’t want to talk about basic aspects of her life for the camera and I don’t think I’m alone when I say I am so over it. The only reason she’s not a struggling single mother limping a rusty Ford Taurus to a rural Pennsylvania WalMart right now is because she gets pregnant, has baby daddy drama, & we are entertained by watching. It’s time for her to get her surgically-altered swollen ass in front of that camera & do her job.

But let’s be real: even if the season consists entirely of watching Kail’s bump grow & listening to her talk about how she doesn’t wanna talk… we’re gonna watch it when it airs on Monday night.

 

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23 Comments

  1. Jace and kaiser's family therapist says:

    This is why they brought on brianna and her family cause theu are willing to spill any tea that is going on in their life

    14+
  2. Trailer Trash Train Wreck says:

    So if she is saying that he doesn’t want his other hoes knowing about her is she calling herself a hoe too???

    20+
  3. Baby Daddy #3 says:

    Oh my god this article is hilarious

    9+
  4. Jenelles Dramastic Change says:

    Can we get rid of Kail and have Eddie and Janet?

    20+
  5. rosie says:

    Again this proves my theory that that whole “planed baby” speach was pure BS

    17+
  6. Hairstyles of the Rich & Alnost Fanous says:

    Loving your writing style Lana! Keep up the good work!

    17+
  7. Old lady says:

    Yes! This article was Great!!!

    And I’m so over Kail; I feel so sorry for her children!

    10+
  8. Grace says:

    When Jo told Kail she doesn’t deserve sunshine and should live in a cave 😂

    17+
  9. Nikki says:

    Kailyn is one of those passive agressive bitches I can’t stand that talk around everything to get attention and then when asked to clarify, she shuts it down right away and refuses to discuss it. Why would ANYONE want to claim her as the mother of their child. #TeamChris only because I cannot stand Kailyn.

    15+
  10. Suzzette says:

    Have NEVER been a fan of her flip flop personality, she treated Jo badly, that other random guy?? with Javi she was a selfish ungrateful cheating wife and now she’s finally coming clean about being a “ho” well is she coming clean if she’s calling BD#3 girls “ho’s” and she’s just another one of them?? idk but she needs to get her head out of her butt and do what they pay her to do, which is answer producer questions or get herself a real 9-5 job and be private…..lol yeah right

    7+
  11. Leah's Meth Pipe says:

    Let’s be real. The dude is embarrassed. He fucked up.
    He just wanted somewhere to spray his baby batter. Not actually MAKE a baby. Kail wanted dreads to run her fingers through seeing as she got ridiculed for her own attempt at them, so she tried trap-babying him because it’s worked for her in the past.
    Now the boy has regrets. And Kail is hulk-mad.

    17+
  12. KB says:

    The snark in this article and in the comments is giving me life. 🙌🏻👏🏻 Thanks ladies!

    13+
  13. chelseas annoying baby voice says:

    Don’t BITCH about baby daddies and other hoes, Kail, when you don’t seem to use protection..

    7+

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