Recap | Knocked Up, S1 E1 – Audra

Hey guys! I highly recommend checking out this show called Knocked Up. It airs on Lifetime every Tuesday at 9/8 c, and it is produced by the same team that brought you 16 & Pregnant, including Morgan J. Freeman. Now, instead of watching teenaged train wrecks, you’re watching mid-30s trainwrecks! Fun stuff. 🙂 To get ya started, here is the recap of the first episode.

Audra is 32 and lives in Orange County, California. She loves her job working at a doctor’s office and is proud to say she’s a reformed party girl. Last year, she finally got sober and turned her life around.

To prove how sober she now is, we see Instagram-y photos of her in Laguna Beach meditating with her friends.

knocked up audra

But Audra says her hard-earned and peaceful new lifestyle got fucked the hell up when she hooked up with “an old friend” and got preggers! Whoopsie daisy! I did not see that coming!

It turns out this “old friend” is not a very good friend. He wants nothing to do with Audra or the baby. Audra says where she lives and works is about to be turned upside down.

We first meet Audra when she’s 23 weeks pregnant with her baby boy. She says a lot of her friends have flaked away, because apparently they fear the pregnancy cooties?  But the one good friend she still has is Liz. So she goes to visit Liz, who apparently has a chubby baby of her own.

At least these gals are more on trend than our West Virginia cohorts

Liz is already turning this poor baby into a surfer douche model

They go on a walk together and Audra complains that she feels huge now that she’s 6 months along. But she looks fantastic! Is she just fishing for compliments or is she seriously that delusional? And who wears these heels to go on a walk? This is SO Orange County, guys. The camera even keeps panning down to these ridiculous shoes as she hobbles along holding onto the stroller.

knocked up audra

Seriously? I look more pregnant after eating a burrito.

Liz says she was shocked when she learned Audra was pregnant, so this prompts the whole conception-night explanation. Audra went on vacation to her hometown to visit her father and ended up hooking up with a guy she knew in high school. “It was your standard Netflix & Chill,” she says. The guy stopped mid-way and asked if she wanted him to use a condom, and she said “I thought there was absolutely no reason.”

No seriously. She pulls the Maci Bookout card and says her doctor told her she could never get pregnant, and it’s not like STDs are a thing, so you know… YOLO.

Liz asks if she was drinking, but Audra says she was completely sober that night, but she admits she’s as true of an alcoholic as there ever was. At least there’s some self-awareness here. The baby daddy told her he wanted to sign away his rights immediately upon finding out, and Audra is crushed.

Next, we see Audra go out to eat with her mom, Irene, with whom she has a “complicated relationship.” Irene thought the whole thing was an April Fool’s Prank. Audra says she expected her mom would shame her. Irene says she’s from a strong, traditional Mexican background and thinks the whole thing is just wrong. Audra makes her case that it’s 2016 and people shouldn’t have to walk around with shame for being given the beautiful gift of a baby.

knocked up audra

But… he’s not even a boyfriend. YOUR BABY HAS NO DADDY.

Irene tries to be sympathetic and  reaffirms that she believes the baby will grow up to do great things. Like not abandon his kids and shit. You know.

Next we see Audra at her 26-week ultrasound with her buddy Liz. They’re wearing the exact same clothes from the 23-week meet up, but…whatever. Audra is excited to learn her baby is still a boy! She plans to name him Zane. Liz asks if she’s considering sending the ultrasound photos to the baby daddy. She thinks B.D. will come around if he sees it.

Audra then reads a letter she composed to the baby. She says he is her little miracle, and when she was told in her 20s she’d never have kids, she prayed and prayed and prayed for him. She explains to her son that his dad hasn’t asked once about him. Ouch. Don’t think kiddo needs to know that.

Audra worries that she made a selfish decision in keeping this pregnancy knowing her child would not have a dad. Audra breaks down and Liz starts crying as she’s breastfeeding her own son.

knocked up audra

Real friends, guys. Remember when TM had real friends?

Later, we see Audra and her roommate Anthony. Audra has decided to not renew her lease with Anthony because of her pregnancy. Anthony comes in and checks out the ultrasound photos. Upon learning he was looking at a penis, he comments, “He’s already got a career!” Creepy!

knocked up audra

Yep, this kid will be going places in L.A. for sure!

However, Anthony does his best to offer a man’s perspective on how Audra should deal with sending the photos to the B.D. He urges her to call him instead of dropping the photos like a bomb. She does call, and B.D. says he doesn’t want to see them. Anthony is shocked at B.D.’s reaction, because Anthony is apparently not a complete douchebag. Good for you Anthony!

At 34 weeks, we learn that Audra is planning to put Zane in daycare ASAP so she can return to work. She and her mom Irene goes to a private home to meet the owner of a daycare named Nataly. Nataly shows off what passes for a huge backyard in Irvine, CA.

knocked up audra

Astroturf as faaaar as the eye can see!

Audra asks responsible questions about capacity and licensing. Audra tells the lady she is on a “very limited income” because she spends so much on her garish blush and lipstick. When Nataly tells her the total is $60 per day, or about $1200/month, Audra realizes she can’t swing it. She is hoping she can get assistance from the state to make ends meet.

Next, Audra has to deal with her work. She works for a plastic surgeon’s office, and is taking 6 weeks of unpaid maternity leave and she just got a pay cut. She says her salary is not that great, which is kind of sad and surprising for someone working for a plastic surgeon in Orange County… Anyway, she goes to meet with her office manager Jennifer. She wants to confirm that her job will still be there for her when she returns from her leave. Jennifer says she doesn’t know what the office would do without her and to not worry about her job security.

Audra tells her manager that she is thinking she might have to move in with her mom. But she says she and her mom do not get along. Jennifer reassures her that it will all work out and no grandmother would turn away her daughter and newborn grandson. (Oh ho ho! So think you!)

That night, Audra goes out for ice cream with mom Irene. They complain about how big the “small” ice cream is then talk about how nice the daycare was while agreeing that the cost seemed undoable. Audra broaches the subject of not knowing where she’ll live, but Irene shuts that shit down fast. She tells her “You need a backup plan, because you’re not moving in with me.”

“We’re water and oil together,” Irene continues. Audra is visibly upset that her mom isn’t willing to let her move in even as a last resort option. Irene says she’s not mentally in a good place and wouldn’t be good for her daughter or for Zane.  She raised her kids to adulthood and wants her own time now. She just throws out a laundry list of reasons this isn’t gonna happen like office manager Jennifer insisted it would.

Now at 35 weeks pregnant, Audra is Facetiming her dad for help. But he surprisingly supports Irene’s decision. He admits it’s scary that she’s alone, though. Audra says she does technically qualify for low income housing and has started the process of that. Her dad is planning to come visit and sleep on the couch to help with the baby for the first week.

Audra’s friend from Michigan comes to visit and they do a plaster belly cast. They have a boring repeat conversation of everything that’s already been discussed.

knocked up audra

The affection they had for this plaster was fucking weird.

Next, Audra goes with her Realtor friend Trina to find an affordable place to live. (Hint, you might want to move out of IRVINE!) Audra is honestly starting to drive me crazy with this shit. She is whining about money the whole time but doesn’t want to leave what is one of the most expensive cities in the county.  You can’t have your cake and eat it, too!

Trina gets them in to look at a one-bedroom, $1700/month apartment. After a walk-through of the literal two-room apartment, she tells Trina she can’t afford this. Even though she knew how much it was before they went and saw it…. Argh! Way to waste this poor Realtor’s time!

She goes home and talks to her roommate Anthony. She wants to consider staying there with the newborn. Anthony says he isn’t into the whole baby crying and shit, but he’s cool with her staying. He doesn’t want to change diapers, though. Damn, bro. You are an officially super chill dude.

Audra says she is planning to list the Baby Daddy on the birth certificate, but she is “too proud” to ask him for child support money.

After a break, we see Audra at home realizing she’s in labor. She calls the hospital and is told to come in right away. She calls her mom to bring her in. She gets an epidural and some Pitocin before having baby Zane. She is extremely overcome with emotion, and you can tell how much she loves this baby.

birth1

While Irene cuts the cord, Zane pees all over Audra. The next day, Audra says she’s still pinching herself that he’s here. She gets a call to get the baby registered or something. She explains that she put the dad’s name on the birth certificate, but we learn that in the state of California, if a mother is not married she needs the dad to sign a declaration of paternity. Audra explains that ain’t gonna happen, so the lady tells her they can’t register him as the father.

When she asks how she can file for child support, she’s told again that B.D. would have to go down to the county courthouse and sign the paternity paperwork. Audra hangs up and gets very upset for a moment.

knocked up audra

But you don’t understand… This was a one-night stand in another state!

Honestly, I’m wondering why she can’t order a paternity test that he would be forced to take? I really don’t understand the law here. As much as we rag on these girls for the snark, this bit seems kind of unfair.

Audra gets over it pretty quickly and tries to not let it ruin her trip home. Irene compliments how well she’s handling things.

With Zane now 3 days old, Audra tells her mom that she texted the birth info and newborn photos to the B.D. She never got a response. Get a clue, Audra. HE’S NOT INTERESTED.

knocked up audra

I’m interested, though. This baby is freaking cute!

Audra’s dad Thomas shows up and instantly falls in love. He’s so happy to learn the baby’s middle name is after him. Thomas seems to help out with the baby, which is nice. Later, Audra tells him she’s going for a Master’s degree in school counseling. He thinks she’s well suited for that. Thomas leaves back to Michigan a week later, and Audra is getting ready to go back to work when she receives an ominous text from her boss.

knocked up audra

The boss texts saying “Don’t freak out, but we hired 2 new people.” Audra goes for a stroller walk with friend Liz to complain about her work worries. Liz tries to tell her to take it one step at a time and not freak out.

Later, mom Irene comes over and Audra tells her she and Zane went to church. They talk about the ups and downs of their mother-daughter relationship again. Audra tells her she appreciates all the work now that she’s a mom herself. There are tears.

The next day, she takes Zane to daycare for the first time so she can go to work. It turns out Irene has agreed to pick up the baby in the afternoon so Audra can pay 50% of the original price. She cries in the car after she leaves Zane.

SEE! Everything works out! Golly gee! She kept her job, didn’t have to move or increase her rent, and got a discount on daycare thanks to dear ol’ mum. Amazing how pregnancy magically makes the universe go your way, right?

We end with a montage of Audra saying she loves being a mom and is willing to work her buns off to make sure she and Zane are okay. Kudos to you for stepping up as a single mother, Audra.

 

Tags:

16 Comments

  1. Ambien says:

    Thanks for the recommendation and the recap. Will be following and watching too!

    2+
  2. Nikki says:

    I watched this episode and Audra annoyed me too with her princess attitude toward living. Move to a cheaper city. But she ended up ok with the baby and seems like she will be a good mother. Stop texting the father though, he doesn’t care!

    5+
    • El-ahrairah says:

      Yes! I recognized the apartment complex she lived in. That place, 2 bedroom *starts* at $2400/mo. Even if she’s splitting that, I mean holy shit!

      2+
      • Teen Mom: Oops Babies says:

        Yeah she better move to Santa Ana lol. I used to live in SoCal and I worked in Orange County too! But I lived in Riverside Country (much cheaper).

        3+
  3. Baby Bear says:

    I’m pretty sure she was driving a Lexus. How about downgrading on the ol’ wheels?!

    7+
  4. Leah's Meth Pipe says:

    I hope we get this one in Aus too. Looks like 30-somethings can be just as dopey as 16yr olds.

    2+
  5. Bud Life says:

    I’m sorry I can’t even finish this article without commenting

    1. Zane makes me think about the sexy books
    2. In 2016 WHY TF DOES EVERY WOMAN NOT HAVE PAID MATERNITY LEAVE. My god the fucking sexism that is life. Idc if she’s part time or what. That is some fuckery

    4+
    • Kayekaye says:

      Agreed. It’s BS. I was fortunate enough to have 3 months after my youngest, but I needed to save for months to pay for everything during that time, nothing from my job. Then we’re forced back after 6 weeks and it isn’t anywhere near long enough to establish the bond, get baby on a schedule, nurse on demand, and establish a good milk supply for when you’re not there. Physically I couldn’t pump, so she had to switch to formula when I went back. It stinks.

      2+
  6. Bud Life says:

    Now that I’m finished. Fuck all those laws which seem to protect ain’t shit men from taking care of children. Like I get women might lie, but it seems like a lot of fucking work to get support for a child who it took two people to create.

    I get she coulda told him to wear a condom, but HE shouldn’t have treated it like a fucking optional bonus. He shoulda just worn it. Jesusgod at all of this fuckery

    4+
  7. Jennelle's next Endorsement Deal says:

    I’m really perplexed after reading this… I’m in HR, and I worked in an HR outsourcing call center for a couple years. I know for a fact CA has the BEST maternity leave for residents, its basically double what I would get here in my state, if not more. I do think there are some restrictions, which are you must be a full time worker, and maybe have been with the company for a full year before using the maternity leave (this part is a little fuzzy to me now). So honestly, it sounds like home girl might not have worked there long enough or enough hours to get the full benefits. I want to feel bad for her, but judging by comments before me, she really should just think about moving to a cheaper area…. I cannot WAIT to watch this show now lol 🙂

    2+
  8. Mo says:

    She reminded me of Miranda Sings in the scenes where she was wearing the red lipstick lol. I can’t believe how hard it is just to get the father to pay child support. What a pos. Her roommate was a nice and understanding guy though.

    2+
  9. Nathan's Ponytail says:

    The friend’s baby looks like baby Derek Zoolander Jr. Any minute now he’s going to show us blue steel or magnum.

    4+
  10. Barbara's Home for Abandoned children says:

    Oooh homegirl left out alot. She is in California, and if she is fulltime she would have had 6 weeks paid maternity leave. So since hers was unpaid, she isnt even working FT.

    When she gets state help, they require you to name the baby daddy and they WILL go after him for support.

    She is all kinds of stupid. Sell the Lexus and buy a chevy, move out of Irvine, get a FT job, stop texting the baby daddy.

    3+
  11. Linh says:

    Oh my goodness! an incredible write-up dude. Thank you Even so I’m experiencing concern with ur rss . Do not know why Unable to subscribe to it. Is there any person acquiring identical rss trouble? Everyone who knows kindly respond.

    0
  12. It was amazing to read this info and I think you’re entirely correct. Tell me if perhaps you’re looking into phone tracker, that’s my major competence. Hope to hear from you soon, take good care!

    0

Share your opinion.

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *